Well I knew I wasn't going to be going to church today so I wanted to get into John 11 and read it for myself. We are doing a study over the book of John at Frontline! Loving it.
As I was reading John 11 my heart became filled with thankfulness.
In the book of John the people are weeping because Lazarus has died. Mary and Martha are both deeply saddened at the loss of their brother and admit to Jesus they know he would not have died if He would have been there when he was sick.
When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. (NIV)
When Jesus saw her weeping and saw the other people wailing with her, a
deep anger welled up within him, and he was deeply troubled. (NLV)
I was sitting on my back porch thinking over the last few years and thinking about how I wish some things had worked out differently and how some things didn't change and how some things did change. As I sit here and think about all of the times I cried out to God for strength and cried out to God to heal my broken heart, he wept for me. Jesus... the Son of God. He cares so much for me that He himself gets angered at situations in our lives that cause us strife and cause us pain. I take so much comfort in knowing that when I am hurting and sad or angry or someone has done something wrong to me that Jesus is right there by my side angry, upset, hurt, and crying WITH me and FOR me. I think about how the verse says he was deeply troubled. It reminds me of the show intervention where you can see the tiredness and the sadness and worry in the families eyes as they beg their family member and friend to take help. When someone is in a desperate situation or are seriously hurting we always tend to get a little more involved than when we just know they have a bad situation in their life. Everyone has bad situations. But Jesus looks at every single situation in our life that we are struggling with or do not have peace in and he is deeply troubled by our pain. How can God love people so much when we constantly constantly screw up and do crappy things. This is the biggest picture of love that I have gained revelation of in a long time.
You guys, I know I am hypocritical about a lot of things. But Jesus loved the hypocrites too. I just plan on falling more and more in love with my Savior. It would be impossible not to because of hos much love he shows me. How can you not love someone who is constantly there for you and constantly blessing you and looking out for you? Giving you gifts and guidance. Protecting you and giving you hope for your future. I serve the greatest God. The only God. A God who weeps for me.